Category Archives: Stories


COLLETTE DIVITTO is a disability advocate who has down’s syndrome and is an owner of her own Boston MA cookie company. I love cookies – my downfall, just as my body, is sweets. Good & Plenty is my fav licorice treat – 155 pieces of godlike candy in a 6 oz box. It’s fat free but NOT CALORIE FREE – but that’s another story.

I read about Collette and her business when researching companies whose owner’s are considered disabled. So just take a look at her site – she’s anything BUT DISABILED & I want some of her cookies. I love cookies.

Collette/her sister/her mom


Collette, a young woman born in 1990 with Down Syndrome, has been creating her own recipe for cookies for fun! But after rejection repeatedly when applying for a paying job and being told she had great skills, was always told the same thing…she was not “a good fit”.

Collette was determined to open her own business and try to earn a living on her own. Collette, a very tenacious young woman, despite any disability, was off to show people how able she is and how other’s like herself can be of great value to their community. Collette has created a global movement (check out her In The News Page) and is known by many throughout the world.

Her response to all this new unintentional fame is, “why are people so surprised”.  Collette travels around the country to share her inspiring story, and constantly encourage people to focus on their abilities rather than what they can’t do.

She speaks to audiences of hundreds to thousands and has decided she needs to use her platform to create change and to help the non-disabled population see abilities and start including and employing people with disabilities more and more. It pains Collette to know 82% of people with a disability, that are capable of work, cannot find paying jobs…which means they cannot live independently. 

With every cookie sale Collettey’s has, Collette is one step closer to offering yet another employment opportunity in her company.  And with every cookie sale Collettey’s has, Collette is also one step closer to her “Call to Action” plan that she insists on leading.

This plan is to represent her community in Washington, D.C. with a written employment incentive policy for adoption, and to request the elimination of the sub minimum wage. She has been referred to as “One smart cookie” and “One tough cookie”.

Collette is working with interested partners for production locations across the country, all of which are culinary training organizations for people with disabilities whose graduates cannot find jobs.  It’s a win win….so please order cookies for all your gifts so Collette can continue to expand!

With her trademark sass and drive to work hard and succeed, keep an eye on this girl!

her mission

The Mission                                             

With all the great strides that society has made recently in acceptance and equality, the disability community is often overlooked. Many people are surprised to hear about the rejection that Collettey’s Cookies CEO Collette Divitto faced in trying to find a paying job, but sadly her story is actually typical among people with disabilities – 82% of people with a disability are unemployed. Many of them want to work, have valuable skills to contribute, and ache for the chance to prove themselves and earn a living.

Even among that much smaller percentage of people with disabilities who are employed, most of them live in poverty due to the 14c Exemption to the Fair Labor Standards Act. This is a little-known federal law that excludes Americans with disabilities from receiving the federal minimum wage and allows employers to pay them whatever they think they’re worth. When this law was first passed in 1938, it required employees with a disability to earn at least 75% of the minimum wage. But things have changed over time. In 1966, that rate dropped to 50% and in 1986, that percentage was removed altogether. There have been reported cases of people with disabilities making as little as $1 an hour. This is simply unacceptable.

The mission of Collettey’s Cookies is to create jobs for people with disabilities, change the public perception of just how capable this population truly is, and work with Congress in Washington, D.C. to adopt policies that would abolish the 14c Exemption to the Fair Labor Standards Act, and provide tax incentives to employers that hire workers with a disability.

Collette has hired several people with disabilities, and will continue to hire more as Collettey’s Cookies continues to grow. The company is working to develop co-manufacturing partnerships with organizations both across the United States and internationally to open locations in their facilities and employ people with disabilities in those cities. Collette has also started a non-profit, which provides advocacy, employment training, and her personally-developed entrepreneurial program. A percentage of each cookie sold by Collettey’s Cookies is donated directly to the non-profit.

In support of this mission, Collette is looking to team up with documentary film producer.

Collette hopes an unscripted doc of her life day to day and all the past achievements to help inspire and bring hope to others in the disability community.

Every cookie you order helps bring Collette one step closer to hiring another person with disabilities, providing training to an underserved population, getting to Washington, and changing the world.  Sign my petition to create jobs:


While I cannot buy any cookies now because I have to lose 30 pounds before June 15 – I do intend to buy some from her AND I also follow her on #instagram. You should, too!


So two of my actors for VEGAS Reading met on Sunday at his home in PA for the first time. It was if they were friends forever. They read together and it was a situation where MAGIC HAPPENED right in front of us. Our Art Director, Tina, took some videos and pictures. I have included them in this post. Below is Maro DeLo who plays bad guy ANTHONY (in the wife beater undershirt) and Shenendoah (in the blue henley) who actually does not need a last name but he has one – Thompson who plays Dominick. Scene 1 taken on a cell phone. It was our first time meeting Shenendoah so when he walked in the door on Sunday I leaned over to Tina and asked her “did you invite #bradpitt?” Ahhhh – I love my actors!

Shenendoah drove 2 hours to do this on Sunday. Guy’s a trooper and he is a referral by one of our other actors, Anthony Wilcox who plays COOKIE. I’ll always look at a referral first. I have never been steered wrong by referrals except for one person who shall remain nameless.

Those are NOT real cigarettes but Maro did put it behind his ear. LOL I think he burned himself. Don’t worry Maro, John said he’s gonna teach you how to use a cigarette since you don’t smoke.

Lastly, Today 3/7/23 – The boys have adopted each other as honorary brothers. These guys are good actors and funny, too! Both of these young men are musicians. This is #shenendoah’s instagram and this is Maro’s

AND if anyone is interested please follow COGNITIVE FUNGUS on #instagram here:




MTG is complaining that a woman and her son, who disagreed on MTG political stance “attacked” her in a restaurant Monday Night. This is the same MTG who stood up multiple times during several STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESSES BY POTUS BIDEN to call him “LIAR”.



YEAH – I DON’T LIKE HER. I WISH HER THE WORST. I think this is the HEIGHT of HYPOCRISY that she’s annoyed at this woman.

The woman and her son should get a medal for annoying her. Next time make it a CHOIR SINGING BAD SONGS TO HER ABOUT HER TO HER FACE.



The Hill

Marjorie Taylor Greene says she was ‘attacked’ by ‘insane’ woman in restaurant

HOW DOES IT FEEL YOU MORE ON!? (how you would spell if you were MTG) LOL

Written by Julia Shapero

Tue, February 28, 2023 at 7:39 AM EST

Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-Ga.) said she was “attacked” by an “insane” woman in a restaurant on Monday night.

“I was attacked in a restaurant tonight by an insane women and screamed at by her adult son,” Greene said in a tweet. “They had no respect for the restaurant or the staff or the other people dining or people like me who simply have different political views.”

“I was sitting at my table, working with my staff, and never even noticed these people until they turned into demons,” Greene said.

“People used to respect others even if they had different views. But not anymore,” she added. “Our country is gone.”

Greene did not provide details in the tweet regarding where the alleged incident took place or if police responded. The Hill has reached out to her office for comment.

Greene stirred up a political firestorm last week when she once again called for a “national divorce” between Republican and Democratic states.

“We need a national divorce. We need to separate by red states and blue states and shrink the federal government,” Greene tweeted at the time. “From the sick and disgusting woke culture issues shoved down our throats to the Democrat’s traitorous America Last policies, we are done.”

She made similar comments about a “National Divorce scenario” in December 2021, when she suggested that “Democrat voters and big donors” had brought “ruin” to California and shouldn’t be allowed to move to Florida without a “cooling off period.”

Greene has previously faced threats while serving in Congress.

A New York man pleaded guilty earlier this month to sending Greene several threatening voicemails last March, in which he said he was going to cause her “physical harm” and threatened to “pay someone 500 bucks to take a baseball bat and crack your skull.”

Updated at 8:16 a.m.

For the latest news, weather, sports, and streaming video, head to The Hill.


First when film #RUST had that shooting and the cinematographer’s death took front and center with Republicans piling on actor #alecbaldwin because of his liberal take on issues, I thought “this is just bullshit. Nothing will become of it. Rest in Power to the woman who died”. But This problem with BLANKS in Guns and having an ARMORIST on set has been long time coming imo.

Obviously I was not on set when Alec pointed the gun at Halyna and then pulled the trigger. He is saying he didn’t pull the trigger but then how did the bullet get out of the gun? Was Beetlejuice there to do the mischief? Why was a real bullet in the gun? The Amorist Gutierrez-Reed was in charge of that gun she and Baldwin are looking at #INVOLUNTARYMANSLAUGHTER – MAX of 18 MONTHS IN PRISON.

Now 3 other people are suing Baldwin for #PTSD because of the shooting. The highlighted word is where you can find the article. Frankly I find fault with the entire production team and unfortunately for Baldwin he is a producer on this film. He stands to benefit from it’s completion and release.

Baldwin is also the father of 7 and the grandfather of 1 by his daughter Ireland whose mom is #kimbasinger. Honestly, and I do not know him nor do I care to, he and his baby making machine he married are going to be in hot water if he goes to jail for 18 months. Even one month will kill Baldwin’s career. He will go the way of #tomsizemore working with has beens, never weres if he goes to jail. My advice to Alec – wear a condom.

Alec Baldwin & his 7 kids with baby maker mom

TOM SIZEMORE was, for a very long time, one of my favorite character actors in Hollywood. I did know him as a person and it seems he was not a very good person from what I have read. Because of his drug use and alcoholism and many treks to rehab he is braindead. Really sad to read that article that his family is planning how to end his life. Even #robertdeniro tried to help this guy but he went right back to boozing and drugging so rehab did not help.

Hollywood can do one of 3 things to people-1)make you a star, 2) make you dead, 3)drive you back to your home state. I took #3 for the win because NOW Hollywood is coming back East in 2023 – to NJ with studios from #Netflix and #LIONSGATE coming back east to do so.

This is how I will always remember #tomsizemore




Blast at Ohio factory scatters molten debris, starts fire; 14 injured

Scene at the Ohio Factory Blast today????

Mon, February 20, 2023 at 4:15 PM EST

By Daniel Trotta

(Reuters) -An explosion tore through an Ohio metals plant on Monday, scattering molten metal and debris that rained down on neighboring buildings and injuring at least 14 people, mostly with burns, officials and witnesses said.

The blast sent smoke billowing into the sky that could be seen for miles around the damaged factory about 15 miles (24 km) southeast of Cleveland.

The explosion of unknown origin at the I. Schumann & Co. metals plant in Bedford drew fire departments from throughout northeast Ohio.

Oakwood Fire Department Captain Brian DiRocco addressed the media on scene, saying 13 people were taken to hospital, many of them with burn wounds, and one more was being treated on site.

At least one was in critical condition, and one was pulled from the debris. All of those injured were on site, the falling debris having spared those at neighboring businesses, DiRocco said.

“The people were mostly walking wounded,” DiRocco said. “I’m sure there’s a lot of people that work here that were in shock.”

DiRocco said he had inspected the site before and found it a safe place “except for the fact that it’s a foundry. You are dealing with molten metal, so there’s always an inherent danger.”

The cause was unknown, and damage to the plant was “significant,” the company said.

“We will work alongside investigators in their search for answers as part of our commitment to Northeast Ohio, where we have been operating for more than 100 years,” I. Schumann and Co., which produces copper, brass and bronze alloys, said in a statement.

Matthew Wiggins, owner of the neighboring business Rose Colored Gaming, told WOIO he heard a large explosion and that “within a second or two, it sounded like large amounts of debris were hitting the roof.”

“Things were falling off the walls, falling off shelves. We went out front and there was like smoldering rocks and molten metal in the yard. Tons and tons of smoke. Fire billowing out of the building across the street,” Wiggins said.

Another witness, Joe Sarconi, said a brick wall enclosing the property was obliterated.

“A beam flew across the street. That other beam flew across the street and blew out our window,” Sarconi said. “Exciting, but horrible.”

The explosion was about 70 miles (112 km) northwest of East Palestine, Ohio, where earlier this month a train loaded with toxic chemicals derailed, causing a fire that sent a cloud of smoke over the town and forced thousands of people to evacuate.

(Reporting by Daniel Trotta in Carlsbad, Calif.; Editing by Sandra Maler, Chris Reese and Lincoln Feast)


While I am not a conspiracy theorist but this is weird and I fear it’s not coincidental. I hope I am wrong.



I am not gonna lie this article made me cry. I sang and played guitar for my mom in hospice 10 hours before she passed away in April of 2001. It seems that I sent a lot of people on their journeys that night. I am forever grateful to have been a part of their last moments.



What Happens When You Die? Hospice Workers Share Conversations With Patients as They Near the End of Their Life

Lyssa Goldberg

Sun, February 19, 2023 at 11:24 AM EST·8 min read

Hospice workers share some of their impactful conversations with patients.

Talking about mortality can definitely be a frightening subject. But for some people, like those who work in hospice, discussing what happens when you die may feel like a more natural conversation to have.

So, what does it feel like to be days from death? And what happens to you when you die? While some of these questions may never be answered, we spoke to several hospice care professionals across the U.S. to find out what they’ve learned from their patients in their final days as they prepared to make a transition from life to death.

“Very few people are afraid of death. They’re afraid of dying, the process leading to death,” says Travis Overbeck, National Director of Patient Experience for Seasons Hospice.

Of course, no one truly knows what comes next, but some patients have a very clear idea of what they believe should happen once they die, says Overbeck. Hospice workers like himself get to explore their patients’ belief systems and ask them what they’d like their death to look like.

For instance, in the Buddhist tradition, there’s an expectation of silence at the time of death, according to Overbeck, and there should not be any wailing or grieving at the individual’s bedside so they can make their way peacefully into the next life.

“I’ve seen so many patients at the time of death. Most often, there’s this sense of peace and calm, and it’s really beautiful,” Overbeck says. “That’s why I do what I do. It’s all about bringing that peace and comfort to our patients at end of life.”

Here are some of the most common themes that have emerged from end-of-life conversations with hospice workers.

“Would you mind praying for me?”

Overbeck, a chaplain who sees patients of all faiths and backgrounds but practices Christianity himself, remembers his final conversations with a Jewish patient in her last days of life. She said, “I know you’re Christian, and I know I’m Jewish, but would you mind praying for me?”

“What would you like me to pray for?” Overbeck replied.

“I pray that when I die, it will be peaceful, and I will be comforted,” was the patient’s request.

After some conversation, they prayed together and the two hit it off. When Overbeck returned to the hospital the next day, the patient’s friend found him in the hallway. She told Overbeck that the patient had become unresponsive—but before she stopped speaking, the patient asked her friend to have Overbeck pray for her again if he returned.

Overbeck entered the patient’s room and, knowing that hearing is typically the last sense to go, he reintroduced himself and said, “I’m going to go ahead and pray for you.” He prayed again for peace and a comfortable transition. And at the end of his prayers, suddenly the patient began to talk.

“I’m going on a journey to a place I’ve never been before,” she started, “and everybody is sparkling, and everybody is smiling at me.” The patient died about 45 minutes later.

“I don’t care what belief system you are or aren’t. At the end of the day, that’s real. That was her experience,” Overbeck says.

Bringing life closure

Much of Overbeck’s work is dedicated to tying up loose ends and bringing his patients’ life to closure, whether that’s reuniting family members that have become estranged or ensuring the patient’s legacy is preserved. “There’s a process in dying,” Overbeck says. “It’s the opportunities to say, ‘I love you,’ opportunities to say, ‘I forgive you,’ opportunities to ask for forgiveness, opportunities to say, ‘Goodbye.’”

Overbeck recalls another conversation with a patient who was the CEO of a very large, well-known company. “Travis, I had it all,” the CEO told Overbeck. “I had the vacation homes. I was able to send my kids to the finest schools. We traveled the world. But at some point, I lost my focus. I began to value my job and my money more than anything else.”

Along the way, it cost him not only his marriage but his relationship with his kids. In fact, the patient had a grandchild he’d never even meet. Overbeck asked the patient for permission to reach out to his family. A few phone calls later, they were flying into town to visit the hospital.

Overbeck helped facilitate conversations between the patient and his family members, and while he acknowledges it wasn’t easy, he was ultimately able to bring them a feeling of closure. Most importantly, the patient was able to meet his grandchild for the first time. The patient died later that day.

“The biggest realization that I’ve had is that we all have a finite amount of time—it’s about how you’re going to live with that time,” Overbeck says.

Cultivating gratitude

Carolyn Gartner, licensed clinical social worker with Visiting Nurse Service of New York Hospice and Palliative Care, began practicing meditation and studying Buddhism around the same time she started pursuing social work.

Working in hospice care, she’s found her patients hold a perspective of gratitude and acceptance that parallels what she’s been taught through her meditation practice. “I feel my older patients really understand the idea of letting go, and not letting small things bother you,” Gartner says. “We get so caught up in the day-to-day, and I see my older patients are a good role model for how those things pass.”

Gartner works with a diverse array of patients throughout Brooklyn, from celebrities to patients in public housing. Recently, she and a chaplain from VNSNY Hospice went to visit a Jamaican patient who loves Bob Marley music.

The patient’s daughter told them that her mother had experienced a severe explosion of pain the day before, so Gartner prepared to handle the situation sensitively, thinking perhaps the patient wouldn’t want to listen to music that day.

When they walked in the door, however, the patient was wearing a big smile on her face and said: “Okay, ladies, when are you starting the Bob Marley?’”

“I do think that this work, almost every day, reinforces to me: We are energy. We are light. There is a spirit,” Gartner says.

At end-of-life, people like to reflect on their life story, Gartner says. Patients will take out old photos and share stories of joy and pain all in one session. Having studied screenwriting as an undergrad at New York University, Gartner uses these same storytelling techniques with her patients to learn and listen to their stories.

“My observation is that people will often die the way they live, so it’s really interesting to see how people process what they’ve gone through,” she says.

While the patients may seem ready to accept what comes next, Gartner says it’s the families who often need help coming to terms with it. VNSNY Hospice assists with the pre-bereavement process for family caregivers so they can see beyond the grief and enjoy the time they have left with the patient.

“Patients almost always know what’s going on in their body. It’s the family who doesn’t,” she says.

Seeing lost loved ones

Over the years, Kalah Walker, patient care administrator for VITAS Healthcare, has seen numerous hospice cases where the patients will call out to their loved ones who’ve passed, as if they’re seeing someone that everyone else cannot.

Often, they look out into the distance, and the hospice worker knows it’s the name of a family member who’s no longer with us. Generally, this happens within the last days of their life, Walker notes.

“You know what they’re seeing when they’re looking off into the distance…,” she said. “Once they do that, they’re able to let go.”

Sometimes, the patients will ask their hospice worker if they can see the family member too. Walker says it’s important to be there in the moment with them, agree, and allow the moment to happen as the patient is experiencing it. “There’s a nurse who gets to be there to bring life into this world, and we get to stand there and hold a patient’s hands or their family’s hands as a life leaves this world,” she says.

Walker says the real work with end-of-life care comes after the patient passes, however. “Hospice isn’t just about death and dying. It’s about learning about what’s really important in life and keeping those memories alive,” Walker said.

VITAS’ staff supports families who’ve experienced loss with programs like gifting them memory bears as reminders of their loved ones or butterfly release ceremonies. At the butterfly release ceremony, families will open a package and release butterflies into the sky, giving them a chance to reflect and experience a feeling of release themselves. “I’ve seen the butterflies sit there in the moment. You notice they kind of hover around, and it’s almost as if that butterfly is the loved one,” Walker says.


  • Travis Overbeck, National Director of Patient Experience for Seasons Hospice
  • Carolyn Gartner, licensed clinical social worker with Visiting Nurse Service of New York Hospice and Palliative Care
  • Kalah Walker, patient care administrator for VITAS Healthcare



The Chinese Government is saying that balloon was a weather balloon but we know we cannot trust the Chinese who are our enemies. They are full of shit If they try anything funny America and our allies will blow them right back to the hell they eroded from.

It’s no secret that I dislike the Chinese people and do not trust them as a nation and while I knew so very little of them in my life, I was never attracted to any of them sexually or naturally. I was told by many government people that they are untrustworthy and people call them evil demons. I don’t think that about them but I do think what they did was sneaky. I think they did this stunt on purpose so they can gauge how strong Biden is as POTUS and/or this balloon could have have more virus’ in it like Covid of which we can thank the entire country of China for. We should limit their access to our country as the chinese should not be able to immigrate here or even come here on work visas being they are our enemies. Our nephew, the psychopath who hit his mother in the eye when she tried to stop him from going nuts about his teenage girlfriend breaking up with him in high school, who married a chinese woman who speaks and writes like a stepford wife, changed her chinese first name to an American name and who has a son with him; I believe she is a spy for the Chinese because she is very hostile to her husband’s family especially the women. Probably because we can see through her shit and know what she’s trying to do, which is alienate her husband from his family. This has been done before in my partner’s family by her late brother and his wife who used to be friends with my partner. The second they had children our being not like them became a problem. That’s THEIR PROBLEM.

So wondering what other people’s take is on the Balloon situation but it sure does not warrant an investigation into Biden. That’s just another Republican witch hunt at the expense of us taxpayers.



This is a short post. Tyre Nichols was 29 years old. He ran during a traffic stop and 5 cops beat him up = killing him.

These are the 5 cops who beat him up and killed him:

They are all black.
This is Tyre Nichols:

Tyre Nichols

So the head of the FBI is appalled at what these 5 cops did? So they were fired and charged so quickly my head hurts. Let me repeat – these 5 cops are black people.

Why are black cops being fired and charged and white cops who do the very same thing – are exonerated?

There is a double standard at play here and frankly I find it distasteful and totally racist.


Who was Tyre Nichols? What we know about man killed after traffic stop in Memphis

He was a father. He loved skateboarding and photography. He had a tattoo of his mom on his arm. He was 29.

Tyre Nichols' mother remembers her son, calls for peaceful protests during candlelight vigil

Author: ABC24 Staff (ABC), The Associated Press

Published: 2:38 PM CST January 27, 2023

Updated: 2:50 PM CST January 27, 2023

MEMPHIS, Tenn. — Tyre Nichols was just 29 when he died after a traffic stop by Memphis Police.

His mother, Rowvaughn Wells, said he was two minutes away from home when he was pulled over by police on Jan. 7.

Memphis police said two confrontations occurred between Nichols and officers. After he was arrested, Nichols complained of shortness of breath and was taken to a hospital in critical condition. He died three days later.

Relatives have accused the police of causing Nichols to have a heart attack and kidney failure. Authorities have only said that Nichols experienced a medical emergency.

According to civil rights attorney Ben Crump, who was hired by Nichols’ family, an independent autopsy found that Nichols had suffered from extensive bleeding caused by a severe beating.

Nichols’ family said police beat him to the point of being unrecognizable.

Five Memphis Police officers were fired and later indicted on numerous charges, including second-degree murder, in the death of Nichols. 

READ MORE: Breaking down the charges officers are facing in the death of Tyre Nichols

Video of the incident is expected to released Friday evening.

What do we know about Tyre Nichols?

Nichols’ family has described him as a Sacramento native who loved to skateboard. 

Nichols was the father of a four-year-old son, according to the Associated Press.

“He was one of those people who made everyone around them happy,” said Lucille Washington, Tyre’s Step-Grandmother at a memorial service.

Nichol moved to Memphis just before the pandemic, but got stuck, according to the Associated Press. 

Nichols lived with his parents, and worked second shift at FedEx with his stepfather.

He had worked at FedEx about nine months before his death, according to his mother.

The Associated Press reported that the two would come home together every day on their lunch break at 7 p.m., and his mother would have a meal waiting for them.

“My son was a beautiful soul, and he touched everyone,” she said.

She’d offered to buy her son Jordans, the popular athletic shoes, but he didn’t want them.

“He was just his own person,” she said. “He didn’t follow what anyone else was doing.”

His mother said he had her name tattooed on his arm.

Nichols described himself as “an aspiring photographer” on a website featuring his works.

“My vision is to bring my viewers deep into what i am seeing through my eye and out through my lens,” he wrote. “People have a story to tell why not capture it instead of doing the “norm” and writing it down or speaking it. I hope to one day let people see what i see and to hopefully admire my work based on the quality and ideals of my work.” 

Material from the Associated Press was used in this story


Alcoholics Part 2

So my sister-in-law (SIL) after getting out of hospital A week ago went back in on Friday the 20th. She went back in because she hadn’t been taking her meds, she hadn’t been eating and her blood sugar was through the roof. She is in a diabetic coma and refuses to open her eyes when she comes out of it because she comes in and out of it constantly throughout the day. She is combative and angry and strapped in on one hand because she tries pulling out her IVs. She is in ICU one in a Lowell hospital up in Massachusetts. They know her there. The nurses are very familiar with her case. They offer her help and rehabilitation she always refuses. She just wants to go back home and drink herself to death. What do you do with an individual like that we’re just sitting here watching her die. It’s unsettling.

It’s also killing her sister, my partner, whom I love. she has two sons, one in California one in Washington DC. They both work together in the same business. Those two brothers love each other. One is married one isn’t the one that is NOT will probably never get married. Here’s the problem I find with my SIL – she feels abandoned she feels like her entire life has been shot to shit. She’s right because of her bad decisions. Her sons’ role model was a father who would beat him and his brother up constantly when he was drunk & angry with his wife (SIL). The mother my SIL was combative not towards them as children but towards the husband because she felt locked in the situation she couldn’t get out of. She stayed in her 18 yr failed marriage when he threatened to track her down if she left with the kids and kill them all. Lovely man.

When they divorced she refused to take alimony and that is why she’s in the position she is in now. Her ex-husband is wealthy yet she refused to take his money? she raised both of her sons to not call her “mom“ but to call her by her first name. I tried calling my mother by her first name and she would never answer me until I called her mom. You can’t treat your children as if they’re your friends BECAUSE they’re not your friends they’re your children you gave birth to them, you have to show them discipline that’s what they look for and if they don’t find it in you they gonna go outside to find it. The son that’s married and living in California punched his mother in the eye back when he was living at home and was 17 and his first girlfriend broke up with him. He had gone to the girl’s house and was threatening her mom and the ex and the mom called SIL to come get her crazy son or she was calling the police. SIL tried to get him to go home and then he threatened her and told her “ I’m gonna punch you if you don’t leave me alone”. When she didn’t comply he punched her. She excuses that. SIL thinks love is a punch in the gut and your head being banged on a porcelain sink or against a cement brick wall. SIL believes that if you treat her kindly you don’t love her. There was a guy let’s say his name was RYAN. Ryan was the 3rd wheel in this couple’s relationship and they both had sex with Ryan often. Both SIL and asshole ex hubs were in love with RYAN. Ryan fell in love with SIL and wanted her to leave the hubby and live with him. When asked why she didn’t go her reply will always be “my hubby was more attentive and persuasive”. No mention of love or devotion or any kind of loving terms such as these. No – “he paid more attention to me so he won” basically is what SIL is saying. It’s selfish, it’s self-absorbed bullshit and it’s narcissism on her part.

When SIL and my partner were in their 20s, my partner had puppy that she left with SIL and her then boyfriend – a horny guy from prep – who distracted her (not hard to do) from taking care of puppy who loved to chase cars. While SIL and horny prep boy were dicking around Puppy got crushed by a car and they decided to bury it without telling my partner, who, when she found out, was devastated and didn’t talk to SIL for a long time. She couldn’t even take care of a puppy and this piece of shit had kids?

Btw, her ex did NOT want any kids but when the first was born he doted on him but the 2nd boy was born he was a surprise and the ex treated him like dirt. Hence the reason the 2nd boy is abusive to women – married twice -1 hispanic and his new mail order Chinese bride whose family comes in from Beijing to see her and their only son. If he starts banging her around she will take that kid and go back to China and he won’t ever see his son again. She would do that. I know because she blocked my partner, Xi’s husband’s aunt, when she inquired about him on social media and she has unblocked her but not after many years. I don’t like her and I don’t trust her. Why couldn’t he find a nice South Korean girl if he had to marry outside of his lane? Chinese can’t be trusted. The 2nd son won’t marry a blonde hair blue eyed American girl because she would remind him too much of his mother whom he love/hates. What kind of a kid hits his own mother – I think he’s a psycho and will one day end up killing someone – someone being a woman. He’s afraid of me because I call him out. His son is very cute and needs to know his grandmother – SIL – but she has no intention of ever meeting him. She was told by this son she can come live with him (a disaster of an idea) and Xi but only if she’s sober. Well she’s not going, doesn’t care about the kid, she doesn’t hate anyone but I think she doesn’t like Xi either. I tried to like Xi but it’s hard when someone like that talks like the cook in Bonanza. (hop sing) and I’m not sure it’s on purpose or what but she is so subservient to her husband its unnerving, almost stepford but with a lot of cunning behind him. I don’t trust her.

You can’t treat your children as if they’re your friends they’re not your friends they’re your children and they need love, attention and discipline what they don’t need lenient free wielding parents who have an open marriage.

One Christmas we went up to see SIL. Her sister had cut her hair short. Unbeknownst to us SIL was high on cocaine and alcohol. She flipped out and accused me of bringing a stranger to her home and where was her sister? This went on for a week as we were stranded there for Christmas in a huge snowstorm and couldn’t dig our car out. During that time SIL tried to kill me. With a knife. I don’t think I ever really knew her as a sane woman. For the first year or so of knowing SIL when her boys were still at home she was inconsistent and semi nice but I have no illusions about her. She doesn’t like me and I don’t like her. Even her old girlfriends from college are all alcoholics, drug addicts and whores. When I say whores I mean they would screw a lightbulb to get high if that lightbulb had a dick and product.

One of them lives near SIL and is married to her husband who is a millionaire because of his ability to create software for computers. (my partner recently told me that SIL told her that this woman brought her HEROINE to snort a few years back). WHAT THE HELL? This husband knows that she’s cheating on him and he keeps her as his wife still to this day. She even slept with the pool boy when he was away at work??? WHO DOES THAT? One of their kids grew up to be a psychotherapist and I don’t blame her with parents like this. I know I’m being judgmental but I don’t like this couple. The wife who has been SIL’s friend since 13 years of age has slept her way around all of my partner’s boyfriends when she dated boys. My partner & this woman don’t like each other and her infringement on my partner’s sex life was intentional. In fact, SIL MARRIED my partner’s ex boyfriend and he is the father to her two boys. Her ex is a bisexual and has slept with men he and SIL have dated together- okay so they were swingers. There is a problem with that when you have children. It’s irresponsible and it’s not a protective way to be when your kids were there. What if she had girls you know damn well or at least I do, that these other men involved in their relationship would have sort out her daughters, especially if those daughters looked like their mother. I never found SIL attractive but men upon meeting her go crazy? I have no idea what’s going on but it’s not just with one man ITS ALL OF THEM. I put SIL pix and profile on a dating app to see what would happen and she got over 1000 date proposals. None of that was sincere it was all about sex. None of these men wanted her because they thought she was attractive they just wanted sex out of her. The comments that were made or indecent some of them the platform took it off right away. So SIL is able to manipulate men absolutely.

In her marriage SIL had to cope with the fact that her hubby married her to be closer to her sister, my partner who is gay. On their wedding night it was my partner’s name he called out during sex. My partner, my late brother-in-law, their late parents, and the boys late parents all told SIL NOT to marry him. No one liked him she never listened. That’s her problem she never listens to anyone on anything she’s willful she’s impulsive and she’s an asshole.

So now this woman is again in the hospital for abusing alcohol and her pain meds. She told my partner that if “doctors would just give me more oxy I wouldn’t have to drink” and then she denies drinking a lot. One drink (she started with beer at 13 and has graduated to HARD SELTZER WITH VODKA), can send her to the hospital and intensive care where she is now.

I know I painted a really bad picture of my SIL but there is just no other way to write this – Her eldest son said recently – “I feel like my mother is a spoiled teenagers that I have to take care of for 20 years”. He was 18 when she went off the rails that Christmas when we were there and my partner’s hair was cut short. Before we left she recognized her sister and told us “I was testing you”???? WTF? Yeah I think I know who she really is. Alcohol shines a light on the truth of who a person really is. If I drink too much I fall asleep. If she drinks too much she causes trouble.

I have set up boundaries with SIL and don’t address her but I am going to have to step in and tell her off. She’s going to die anyway by suicide because that is what drinking to death is – suicide. My partner coddles her and always tells her “I love you”. Well tell her something else like “you are a disgrace. You don’t want to help yourself so why should I sit around and watch you die? I’m going to refuse to do that. “

Their late mother once told SIL “I have to love you because I am your mother but I don’t like you.” Very hurtful thing to say and yeah I believe Parents don’t love their children unconditionally – there are always conditions but that is another story.

Sorry this one is so ramped up but no one in my life right now who is a relative or knows about this story is happy about it.


Minimum Wage Increase

The minimum wage increases in NJ every year. Freelancers like me then have to accommodate that rising cost to what we do. I, personally find it annoying because my rate hourly that has to either come down or fluctuate until I find a job that is willing to pay me what I’m worth.

Sincerely if you are a dishwasher or a fast food worker that’s really a part-time job. To have a career when should use the part-time job to go to community college and get out of that part-time job and get a better job. I don’t see why I have to be the one who has to change my rates to accommodate a rising minimum wage for people who don’t deserve it. Why should a fry cook get as much as me when they don’t have my education? The real answer is they shouldn’t. I understand what politicians are doing by raising the The wages but I don’t appreciate it. It puts me in a really bad situation with my family and my income. Finding a job is hard enough than having to now combat people who are uneducated getting the same rate as me. I don’t know how many people have the same problem as I do and I think every time I mention this to someone about my background my education and my experience I get the same answer “we want to hire somebody for a lower rate. “

And the reason for that is, they’re cheap. The companies are cheap they’re willing to train an inexperienced uneducated person to becoming what they want them to become. This is also a problem-let’s take my old profession bookkeeping. In bookkeeping I have seen and followed people into jobs where I had to rework their books because they didn’t know what they were doing and they were taught a certain way and the way they were taught was wrong. then when you try to educate these people on the right way to do things they argue with you. They get annoyed with you. They try to get you fired. But I wouldn’t be hired as a freelancer by their bosses if they were getting the results they wanted. I do have to say honestly most the people that I had to follow who didn’t know what they were doing were minorities. that’s not a racist statement it’s a statement of fact based upon my experience.

This also brings up the word “racism”. If you say something that someone doesn’t like you’re racist. to say that extends beyond The woke crowd and that’s on both sides left and right – will tell you you’re racist based upon just ONE comment. That is ridiculous. I will go so far as to say everyone is racist then based upon peoples comments.There’s also nothing truthful in the statement of “reverse racism“. This does not exist there is only one type of prejudice on race.

Statements of “reverse racism“. This is categorically wrong there is no such thing as reverse racism there is only racism. The meaning of the word has been misconstrued into meeting whatever the accuser is accusing you of. Also wrong. It happens a lot when people lose arguments they then resort to name-calling and the word “racism“ always comes up. how do we combat that to work with people on the left side of the aisle and on the right? You don’t you just laugh and walk the fuck away. they’re not gonna believe you they’re not gonna listen to you so why bother speaking to them. Let them live in their own tunnel world. Don’t we have too many things to do in life we have two much stuff on our plate to have to stop and try to explain yourself to someone who really doesn’t care about anything unless they’re winning the argument.